Alana is a brilliant, funny, successful author of many great works - in her own mind. In the real world, she is an impatient, passionate, and mildly amusing person who attempts to show this through the few things she actually does write. Alana holds an honours degree in Greek and Roman studies from the University of Victoria, where she specialized in ancient sexuality. If you would like to learn about really old penises, you can call her. Unfortunately, there is not a lot of information about really old vaginas, so we can also talk about how patriarchal bias has penetrated through the centuries.